Before I started actually writing the post, I was going to say that there was not a lot to say about October. In a good way. It was a month spent at home, which has been extremely rare this year. Not much happened (although I can still write at length about it!), and it’s reflected in my spending below—spoiler alert, but 64% is a ridiculously high savings rate for me!

The title of this post is a reference to the two things about the month worth writing about: apple picking/fall season, and all things pink tax. Yes, I’m clever.

It’s decorative gourd season, motherfuckers

Despite years of having it on my fall to-do list, it took until this year to achieve maximum basic bitch status: I finally went apple-picking. Gwen and my partner and I went on a hike and then hit up a farm literally right down the road where we picked apples, took the requisite pictures, and also got rained on because Virginia. Also apparently I had never had apple cider donuts until that day and I can now ask with conviction: WHAT THE HELL WAS I DOING WITH MY LIFE BEFORE THAT??

In other fall-related activities, I made a shit ton of pumpkin chocolate chip cookies (here’s the link because I want everyone else’s life to be ruined like mine has been) and one weekend morning I made us pumpkin spice lattes. Which were paired with pancakes topped with the apple butter I made from the apples we picked. What can I say, IT WAS FALL, OKAY?

Pink tax

While not much happened in terms of spending or travel, I spent October paying the pink tax in more ways than one. Yeah, I talk about birth control quite a bit here, but that’s because it’s important. As I’ve previously mentioned (repeatedly), in mid-October I finally got my Nexplanon removed (good riddance) and also that same day did what I said I was never going to do and got an IUD instead of going back on the pill.

The pink tax isn’t just money coming out of my paycheck. It’s living through the traumatic experience of IUD insertion (no painkillers because “it’s only a pinch” so why would you need them?). It’s days and weeks of pain afterwards. It’s now—five weeks later—getting to wake up every day and wondering if I’m going to be cramping or spotting or on my period or none of the above and how many months it’ll take until my body adjusts. But I mean, having an unplanned pregnancy right now would adversely affect me for the rest of my life so whatever, it takes, right? 🤷‍♀️

I bought a heating pad in September and holy hell I can tell you in October it became my #1 favorite purchase of all time. In addition to feeling like I was going to (and also wanting to) die right after insertion, I had horrendous, sustained cramps—far worse than my usual period cramps—for days afterwards and I was inseparable from my heating pad. I took it to work and sat with it on my lap. No fucks given, the heating pad (plus copious amounts of acetaminophen) was the only thing keeping me at work instead of curled up on the couch at home in a ball of pain.

But of course there was also money paid. The personal care spending below includes some face wash, but it also includes a new bottle of acetominophen and a package of pads because post-IUD insertion I’m extremely wary about using my menstrual cup. The spending also includes the Lyft ride home I paid for because no way in hell was I going to be able to metro and then walk home (considering I barely survived even the ride and threw up approximately five minutes after getting home).

To add insult to injury, I also paid a barre class cancellation fee because I was too distracted by the pain to cancel the class in time. And since I only went to four classes in October, I paid a metric fuckton per class this month. I knew IUD insertion was going to be hell, but I didn’t know it was going to take me fully 2.5 weeks before I felt comfortable working out again. It took days after insertion before just the thought of engaging my abs didn’t make me cringe. Before I went back to an in-person barre class, I tested the waters with a prenatal barre workout online, hoping that a class geared toward women recovering from childbirth (ironic, yes) would be gentle enough to avoid triggering horrible cramps.

The shit uterus-owners put up with to keep from getting pregnant is beyond fucking ridiculous and oh, there I go getting mad yet again at the fact that the male version of the pill isn’t currently on the market because some of the side effects were almost as bad as the ones we get to deal with on the regular. ANYWAY.

What you’re here for, even though already I gave away the savings rate

Rent	$700.00
Internet and utilities	$48.05
Groceries	$154.27	Apples and ice cream/chocolate for me the day I got my IUD definitely drove this up, but it’s still entirely reasonable
Barre membership	$104.94
Barre fee	$15.90
Restaurants/bars	$122.42	Going to bars to watch the Nationals win the World Series was a contributing factor here
Misc household goods	$15.55
Personal care	$52.54
Charitable giving	$25.00
Misc dues/subscriptions	$42.99	Patreon dues
Medical	$16.58	The cost of a Lyft home from the OB/GYN. My $30 copay isn’t included because I paid for it with my FSA which comes out of my paycheck pre-tax
Parks pass	$40.00	My partner and I split a parks pass for hiking
Entertainment	$62.12	I bought a ticket to see a show with my partner and mother in December, as well as distillery tour tickets for the first weekend of November
Gifts	$23.15	One of my coworkers left in October and I bought her a bottle of gin as a gift
Total spending:	$1423.51
Paychecks and other income	$1753.67
Retirement contributions	$1908.81
Side hustle income	$335.78
Total income:	$3998.26
Total:	$2574.75
Savings rate:	64%

That definitely helps drive up my average for the year!